Friday, February 04, 2011

SUP Stand Up Paddle Surfing- Maui Hawaii

This is when you know what you know when you're knowin' what you're knowin'. I can do this. A lot of it. Some of it.

Okay, Campers, rise and shine, and don’t forget your booties ‘cause it’s cold out there today, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

In England, a Scottish man was sentenced to 12 months probation after he confessed to having sex with a horse. Asked to comment, the Scot said; “Aye, build a thousand stone walls, do they call you McGregor the wall builder? But you sex-up one horse.”

His initial defense was not strong, he claimed the horse wanted to know what he was wearing under his kilt.

How do you get caught having sex with a horse? The horse didn’t talk. He had to get drunk and brag to someone.

CNN’s Anderson Cooper was slugged ten times by angry Egyptian protesters, that’s not the worst part, they kept yelling to Anderson; “Stop bugging those “American Idol” contestants, Ryan Seacrest.”

Charlie Sheen is going to rehab at home. Who is the idiot who thought this was a good idea? Sheen’s house is called Villa De Chlamydia.

Egyptian President, Hosni Mubarak, may step down, he is going to give leadership to his second son passing over his hard-partying older son, Andy-Dick Mubarak.

How about that Storm of the Century? Hey, it’s effecting California as well. Today I went outside and it was so windy, my hairdresser had to redo my hair.

A researcher claims the model of the Mona Lisa was a young man. That explains why it was going to be called the Mona Adam Lambert.

The day after Groundhog Day and the folks in Punxsutawney, PA are predicting 30 more days of cleaning up groundhog poop.

Wasn’t Punxsutawney the name of Charlie Sheen’s last hooker?

Trouble follows Lindsay Lohan around like an angry Egyptian with a rock; now Lohan was photographed wearing a stolen diamond necklace. It looked nice though, it matched her alcohol detection ankle bracelet.

Since you asked:

Maybe its because we’re in California, but it seems a lot of folks I’ve been talking to are up in the air as to who to cheer for in the Super Bowl.

Green Bay has an incredible history and Super Bowl success. Their star players are likable, namely Aaron Rodgers (with a D the way god intended Rodgers to be spelled) The Donald Driver and my man, Clay the Tres, Trice Nice Clay, Triple Play Clay, Clay Matthews the Third.

But Pittsburgh has an amazing Super Bowl record. And a very likable star in Troy Polamalu.

The fans of the Pack are legendary. Intense but nice. For many Wisconsin fans, the Pack are as much as a part of their lives as fishing, hunting, boating and their pets. They are who my buddy, Foxhole Woody, wants in his foxhole.

Know only one diehard Pittsburgh fan, The Doctor, and he is a great guy. The Pittsburgh fans seem a lot like the Packer fans but with a bigger city.

So if you’re still undecided on who to cheer for in the Super Bowl, let me submit this:

Only one team has a player, Ben Roethlisberger, who twice beat up and sexually abused/raped two girls. That we know about. If you have any women in your life you actually care about, that factoid should take care of that little indecision.

Go Packers.

F@#K Pig Ben.

I've been cooking that lamb shank osso buco for over three hours in the oven and it smells like I'll-be-go-to-hell good all up in this up in here hizzy, yo. Caaaaple a' San Diego Sunsets after a great work out and it is knock on wood tres times, Slattiloids and Nugglieasiaases.