Whimpy, whompy, whombly, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Fierce Estates
Hollywood, Florida is getting the country's first Gay Retirement home. It’s like a regular retirement home except that, when they watch “Murder, She Wrote” reruns, the male residents viciously insult what Angela Lansbury is wearing.
Refuse verbalizing
After losing to the San Diego 23-3, Denver Bronco D.B. Champ Bailey whined about Charger Q.B. Phillip Rivers trash talking. I mean, come on, Rivers's name is Phillip. How bad could his trash talk be? In fact, Phillip calls it refuse verbalizing.
“Your Matriarch is so plus-sized she has to order her clothes from a Lane Bryant catalog.”
“Now I don’t want to say your female sibling is unattractive, but your mother had to put an extra $100 in her debutante ball invitations to get people to attend.”
“Now I don’t want to say your male sibling is unintelligent, but he thinks a split infinitive is a type of motor vehicle.”
Flaming Sunset Gardens
Hollywood, Florida is getting the first Gay Retirement home. It’s like a regular retirement home except that, during the annual resident softball game, the women beat the men 49-0.
Stiffing Paris in a new and different way
Paris Hilton’s grandfather, the former Chargers owner, Barron Hilton, is going to leave almost all of the family fortune to charity; you know what this means? Paris’s rates for a date just shot up.
Paris Hilton is glad to see 2007 end. She got arrested, thrown in jail and now her grandfather is giving away her inheritance to charity. In fact, if 2007 had been any harder on Paris it would have been on a grainy sex video.
Putting the men in retirement
Hollywood, Florida is getting the first Gay Retirement Center. It’s like a regular retirement center except that “The Early Bird Special” is called “The Fiercely Prompt Red-breasted Robin Extravaganza.”
Since you asked:
Wow, I just woke up out a deep, deep sleep and I had the worst dream. You won't believe this, but I actually dreamt that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was going to induct, now don't laugh at me, Madonna. Right? You got that? The "Like a Virgin" Madonna in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Whew. Man, I gotta stop eating those late night carne asada burritos.
What?
Fierce Estates
Hollywood, Florida is getting the country's first Gay Retirement home. It’s like a regular retirement home except that, when they watch “Murder, She Wrote” reruns, the male residents viciously insult what Angela Lansbury is wearing.
Refuse verbalizing
After losing to the San Diego 23-3, Denver Bronco D.B. Champ Bailey whined about Charger Q.B. Phillip Rivers trash talking. I mean, come on, Rivers's name is Phillip. How bad could his trash talk be? In fact, Phillip calls it refuse verbalizing.
“Your Matriarch is so plus-sized she has to order her clothes from a Lane Bryant catalog.”
“Now I don’t want to say your female sibling is unattractive, but your mother had to put an extra $100 in her debutante ball invitations to get people to attend.”
“Now I don’t want to say your male sibling is unintelligent, but he thinks a split infinitive is a type of motor vehicle.”
Flaming Sunset Gardens
Hollywood, Florida is getting the first Gay Retirement home. It’s like a regular retirement home except that, during the annual resident softball game, the women beat the men 49-0.
Stiffing Paris in a new and different way
Paris Hilton’s grandfather, the former Chargers owner, Barron Hilton, is going to leave almost all of the family fortune to charity; you know what this means? Paris’s rates for a date just shot up.
Paris Hilton is glad to see 2007 end. She got arrested, thrown in jail and now her grandfather is giving away her inheritance to charity. In fact, if 2007 had been any harder on Paris it would have been on a grainy sex video.
Putting the men in retirement
Hollywood, Florida is getting the first Gay Retirement Center. It’s like a regular retirement center except that “The Early Bird Special” is called “The Fiercely Prompt Red-breasted Robin Extravaganza.”
Since you asked:
Wow, I just woke up out a deep, deep sleep and I had the worst dream. You won't believe this, but I actually dreamt that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was going to induct, now don't laugh at me, Madonna. Right? You got that? The "Like a Virgin" Madonna in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Whew. Man, I gotta stop eating those late night carne asada burritos.
What?
posted by Alex at
12:23 PM
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