Momma’s little baby loves him his biscuits, biscuits, biscuits, I surely do, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Surro . . . what?
*John Kerry accused President Bush of using surrogates to "do his dirty work," an accusation Bush both denied and didn’t fully comprehend.
In response, Bush denied using surrogates, claiming he doesn’t even know any surrogates, but he has nothing against the fine country of Surrogah.
For his part President Bush said; “I do not use surrogates to do my dirty work. I have people other than me do it.”
No truth
*Best names at the Olympics? Canadian second baseman Stubby Clapp and his wife, Chastity. There is no truth to the rumor that, on their honeymoon, they wore “Clap on, Clap off” t-shirts.
Skimpy is what I’m saying . . .
*Have you seen the U.S. women’s Olympic beach volleyball suits? Do they come standard with a pair of tweezers?
I’ve seen eye patches that cover up more.
*Have you seen how low Michael Phelps wears his swimming shorts? There are plumbers yelling, “Hey, pull those drawers up, for crying-out-loud.”
Odd
*Congratulations to 16-year-old Carly Patterson on her all-around gymnastics gold medal. It must be weird to have a gold medal yet you still have to have your parents drive you around.
I don’t want to say that Carly is young, but when they gave her the gold medal, she tried to unwrap the tin foil to get to the chocolate.
They’re good at it, is all I'm saying . . .
*Aaron Peirsol won the 200-meter backstroke despite being temporarily disqualified by a French judge. When Peirsol turned, the French judge felt that Peirsol didn’t roll over to his back fast enough. But remember, militarily and historically, nobody can roll over faster than the French.
Oh, perfect
*Rodney King is becoming a rapper. King says he's got a CD in the works. But in King's case, CD stands for Car Destruction.
King’s rapper name is BMW-DUI.
It’s a real puzzlement
*Sen. Edward Kennedy has been stopped at airports three times because his name mistakenly appeared on the government’s no-fly list of terror suspects. Gosh, I wonder how his name got in there so many times? Any ideas, President Bush? Hello? President Bush?
A sarcastically chagrined Bush said, “Oh, that’s a list of terror suspects? Shoot, I put his name in that “no fly” list ‘cause that Ted Kennedy's sharp as a tack. You, know, as in: there’s no flies on that boy.”
New credo
A French judge tried to disqualify Aaron Peirsol’s 200 backstroke gold medal performance, now the British are going to protest it, and now the Koreans are protesting Paul Hamm’s gold medal scores. This just in, the Olympic motto has been changed from Citius, Altius, Fortius to Weaselus Whineus, Complainus
Since you asked:
OK, so am I the only one who got mushy about Tyler's dearly departed Tugboat? It just was touching to see how a guy who dreamed all of his life of Olympic gold - although, as a kid it was skiing downhill dreams for Hamilton, not biking - to finally be pushed to that goal so as to honor his beloved fallen beast. A lifetime of dreaming for a medal that, in the end, merely provided temporary solice for man's heartsickness. Poignent? Anyone? Anyone?
Let me know:
lexkase@san.rr.com
Surro . . . what?
*John Kerry accused President Bush of using surrogates to "do his dirty work," an accusation Bush both denied and didn’t fully comprehend.
In response, Bush denied using surrogates, claiming he doesn’t even know any surrogates, but he has nothing against the fine country of Surrogah.
For his part President Bush said; “I do not use surrogates to do my dirty work. I have people other than me do it.”
No truth
*Best names at the Olympics? Canadian second baseman Stubby Clapp and his wife, Chastity. There is no truth to the rumor that, on their honeymoon, they wore “Clap on, Clap off” t-shirts.
Skimpy is what I’m saying . . .
*Have you seen the U.S. women’s Olympic beach volleyball suits? Do they come standard with a pair of tweezers?
I’ve seen eye patches that cover up more.
*Have you seen how low Michael Phelps wears his swimming shorts? There are plumbers yelling, “Hey, pull those drawers up, for crying-out-loud.”
Odd
*Congratulations to 16-year-old Carly Patterson on her all-around gymnastics gold medal. It must be weird to have a gold medal yet you still have to have your parents drive you around.
I don’t want to say that Carly is young, but when they gave her the gold medal, she tried to unwrap the tin foil to get to the chocolate.
They’re good at it, is all I'm saying . . .
*Aaron Peirsol won the 200-meter backstroke despite being temporarily disqualified by a French judge. When Peirsol turned, the French judge felt that Peirsol didn’t roll over to his back fast enough. But remember, militarily and historically, nobody can roll over faster than the French.
Oh, perfect
*Rodney King is becoming a rapper. King says he's got a CD in the works. But in King's case, CD stands for Car Destruction.
King’s rapper name is BMW-DUI.
It’s a real puzzlement
*Sen. Edward Kennedy has been stopped at airports three times because his name mistakenly appeared on the government’s no-fly list of terror suspects. Gosh, I wonder how his name got in there so many times? Any ideas, President Bush? Hello? President Bush?
A sarcastically chagrined Bush said, “Oh, that’s a list of terror suspects? Shoot, I put his name in that “no fly” list ‘cause that Ted Kennedy's sharp as a tack. You, know, as in: there’s no flies on that boy.”
New credo
A French judge tried to disqualify Aaron Peirsol’s 200 backstroke gold medal performance, now the British are going to protest it, and now the Koreans are protesting Paul Hamm’s gold medal scores. This just in, the Olympic motto has been changed from Citius, Altius, Fortius to Weaselus Whineus, Complainus
Since you asked:
OK, so am I the only one who got mushy about Tyler's dearly departed Tugboat? It just was touching to see how a guy who dreamed all of his life of Olympic gold - although, as a kid it was skiing downhill dreams for Hamilton, not biking - to finally be pushed to that goal so as to honor his beloved fallen beast. A lifetime of dreaming for a medal that, in the end, merely provided temporary solice for man's heartsickness. Poignent? Anyone? Anyone?
Let me know:
lexkase@san.rr.com
posted by Alex at
10:58 AM
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