A study shows three drinks a night decreases your chances of old age dementia by 100%. And masturbating five times a week decreases your chances of prostate cancer. But doing both at the same time greatly increases your chances of getting tossed out of Hooters.



Dallas Cowboy, Ezekiel Elliott, who was suspended for six games for beating a woman three times, is going to play the entire season. Ezekiel is an old Dutch word that means: Roethlisberger.