Saturday, April 22, 2017

My noggin was like a toboggan, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Chicago Cubs’ Kris Bryant, has the most popular selling jersey. The least popular jersey? The United Airlines softball uniforms. 

In his interview with Diane Sawyer, Caitlyn Jenner warned people he does not want to discuss his sex-change procedure. Or as it is technically called: a deductadickome. 

In his interview with Diane Sawyer to promote his memoir, Caitlyn Jenner demanded privacy about his sex change procedure. That’s like hiring a skywriter to tell someone you do not want to marry them.

Since you asked:

In his headlong pursuit of fame, Bruce Jenner marries a woman and has two kids and utterly abandons that family. Then he marries another more famous woman, has two more kids and abandons them too. Then he marries a third even more famous woman, has two kids and sticks around because the money is better due to a sleazy reality show.

Then Bruce announces he has been living a lie and started three marriages and three families knowing he was really a woman and changes his name to Caitlyn. Some call that brave. I call it selfish. 

Caitlyn has a sex change operation, writes a book about it and has Diane Sawyer interview him to promote the book where he announces he does not want to be asked about the sex change operation. 

This is reminiscent of the only time I happened to walk by “KUWTK” and got it splattered on me. Bruce was teaching Kylie to drive. She alerted to him that there were some photographers in the car in back of them taking pictures. Bruce lost his mind and basically ran that car off the road endangering him and his young daughter.

Bruce got out of the car and fully road-raged on the paparazzi screaming at them for taking their picture. He did all of this with two freaking “KUWTK” cameramen in his own car. How is it even possible to be that much of a hypocrite? 

Anyone who is against gay marriage, like Jenner, cannot be a spokesperson for transgenders. Jenner cares for nothing but himself and that precludes other transgenders. 

We are just starting to get some semblance of an idea of what a catastrophically selfish asshole Caitlyn Jenner really is.

And while I am not proud of this, I just cannot help but wonder what that thing would fetch on eBay.