Sunday, March 19, 2017

In the World Baseball Classic, USA’s Adam Jones made a game-saving catch to end the game against the Dominican Republic. Adam Jones is no relation to the Bengal’s Adam Jones and you could tell because this Adam Jones was not arrested later that night.

A second White House fence jumper in a week was caught. No danger. It was just a gardener from Mar-a-Lago trying to get Trump to pay his overdue bill. 

Katy Perry admitted she has done more than her hit song suggested, “I Kissed a Girl And I Liked It.” Upon hearing this, many young men's pants just sang “Hello” by Adele.   

Puisque vous avez demandé:

Man did I enjoy “Allied.” 

The Brad Pitt-Marian Cotellard spy romance-thriller. Old school classy. Not only does it seem like it was back in WWII, but the film itself seems like an old “Casablanca” like classic. But with enough action and sexy in it to entertain its modern ADHD audiences. 

Maybe now is a good time to come clean. Yep, it is time to admit it: I am a spy.

Of course we spies do not use the word spy. Personally, I preferred Covert Operative Cognitive Killer. Until I saw what the abbreviation was. 

Now I just use Covert Operative. 

Now why, you ask, would a brilliant spy use the cover of a struggling, ahem, slightlyy older comedy writer? Well, a wildly successful young comedy writer wouldn't really have time to do anything else. And what better cover than someone who appears not smart enough to be good enough for huge comedy success? 

And, besides, no self-respecting spy would give up his cover. right? Unless they wanted you to think they weren't a spy. So what better cover for a spy than admitting his cover? 


In other words, if a spy admits he, or she, is a spy than he, or she, cannot be a spy which is exactly what us spies - or C.O.'s - want you to think. 

Oh, slap dippy bop, patty, dappy boop. 

(No, really, that is a message for Wolverine #32 in Tangiers)

Is there some new rule that the cheesy advertising-whoring "Buzz Feed" wanne-be lists on social media never feature the story and picture that lured you in to begin with? 

Is it just me, or is Kentucky’s natty blue and white checkered uniforms reminiscent of another great athlete who enjoyed success in Kentucky, Secretariat? 

Love. It's what makes a Subaru a Subaru. All those other car makers are just trying to make money off of us. Freaking car whores.