Thursday, February 02, 2017

“TMZ” revealed, at practice, Tom Brady mistakenly put apostrophes on the plural words toes and knees on his wristband. With grammar that bad, it is unlikely Tom will ever amount to anything.

Illinois State signed a recruit named Kobe Buffalomeat. Word has it he is a beefy kid. Due to his great name, he has been grilled by the press. A player this good is rare. But the steaks are high. So let's hope he meats expectations. 

In fact, some think Kobe is so good, he could be remembered for 200 years. Until the Bison-tennial. (OK, that one sucked . . . ) 

A survey claims Sunday morning at 9:00 AM is when most couples have sex. You know what this means? I will never shake people’s hands at brunch again. 

Uber CEO, Travis Kalanick, quit President Trump’s advisory council. The most embarrassing part? After he quit, he couldn’t get a ride home. 

Donald Trump’s physician reveals Trump takes Propecia, a hair-loss drug that causes impotence. Which is why Melania is on Chardonnay. 

President Trump yelled at the Prime Minister of Australia, Malcolm Turnbull. Getting mad at Australia is like yelling at your surfer cousin for getting drunk and dropping his pants at your wedding.

Michigan State recruit, Donovan Winter, could not sign because he was in jail for stealing a gun. “That’s why we give all of our recruits their own gun,” said Baylor.