Well slap me happy and call me Betty, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers
Lindsay Lohan is in jail. You have to admit it takes some of the sting out of not being able to catch Osama bin Laden.
I’m not sure about you, but, boy, with Lindsay in jail, I do feel a lot safer.
In Mexico City, a man was arrested for trying to smuggle 18 tiny monkeys in his girdle. The last thing you want is to go to prison labeled as the guy who smuggles monkeys in his girdle.
A study contends there is a growing social trend of wealthy suburban housewives having casual lesbian affairs. Do you realize what this means? “The Real Housewives of Orange County” may watch “Oprah,” but they really want to be on “Ellen.”
A South African golfer, Louis Oosthuizen, (WHUST-hy-zen) won the British Open. How many ever heard of this Oosthuizen guy? Be honest, how many thought a Oosthuizen was the part of the female anatomy that got Tiger Woods in trouble?
Miami Heat star, Dwayne Wade, is in trouble for comparing NBA losses to the World Trade Center collapse. Give the guy a break, Wade is a great player, but, honestly, when was the last time the Nobel Prize was won by a guy named Dwayne?
It is likely that the NBA will lock out its players next season due to contract disagreements. But don’t worry, if you want to watch rich prima donnas who have multiple affairs in action, you can always watch congress on “C-Span.”
An Air France flight bound for Paris had to return to Brazil because the flight crew assumed the bathrooms were malfunctioning. It turns out the bathrooms were fine, the smell was coming off the French passengers.
In Washington State, a Ferry had to avoid hitting a sailboat and then the four sailors mooned the ferry. Witnesses on the ferry say the four Washington state yachtsmen set an unofficial world record for having the four whitest asses in history.
More tapes emerging of Mel Gibson screaming threatening obscenities and racial and sexual slurs at his ex-girlfriend. Hollywood insiders were shocked. Mel Gibson returned her phone call? Impressive.
Since you asked:
It is hilarious how the little things can get to you.
My album of the summer is the Rolling Stones “Exile on Main Street” Although not the album of a ton of hits, it is incredibly diverse and gritty. Although it isn’t one of my favorite songs, “Just Want To See His Face” is one of my favorite tracks because it captures so well the story of the Stones recording in the basement of a mansion in the South of France. The tribal drums echo with the women’s sexy chants to Mick’s howlin’.
When the girls chime in on their vocals I picture them as hot babes in bikinis singing in the hot, sweaty, dark, dirty basement. You can smell the salt air and hear wine corks popping just up stairs in the grand candlelit elegant dinning hall. As guitar great Ry Cooder once described, you can hear the room in the recording.
At a time when my whole world seemed like Nixon’s sweaty upper lip, avocado polyester leisure suits and gas lines, the Stones recording “Exile” in an exotic Mediterranean basement was the epitome of coolness.
Then I buy and watch the documentary “Exile on Main Street” and what do I see? The vocals were recorded at the plush Sound Factory on Sunset Blvd. Although hot babes, the girl singers were dressed in t-shirts and jeans in a California-chic room with wood panels and Oriental rugs.
So bummed was your buddy, Lex.
When did your buddy, Lex, start referring to himself in the third person?
Lindsay Lohan is in jail. You have to admit it takes some of the sting out of not being able to catch Osama bin Laden.
I’m not sure about you, but, boy, with Lindsay in jail, I do feel a lot safer.
In Mexico City, a man was arrested for trying to smuggle 18 tiny monkeys in his girdle. The last thing you want is to go to prison labeled as the guy who smuggles monkeys in his girdle.
A study contends there is a growing social trend of wealthy suburban housewives having casual lesbian affairs. Do you realize what this means? “The Real Housewives of Orange County” may watch “Oprah,” but they really want to be on “Ellen.”
A South African golfer, Louis Oosthuizen, (WHUST-hy-zen) won the British Open. How many ever heard of this Oosthuizen guy? Be honest, how many thought a Oosthuizen was the part of the female anatomy that got Tiger Woods in trouble?
Miami Heat star, Dwayne Wade, is in trouble for comparing NBA losses to the World Trade Center collapse. Give the guy a break, Wade is a great player, but, honestly, when was the last time the Nobel Prize was won by a guy named Dwayne?
It is likely that the NBA will lock out its players next season due to contract disagreements. But don’t worry, if you want to watch rich prima donnas who have multiple affairs in action, you can always watch congress on “C-Span.”
An Air France flight bound for Paris had to return to Brazil because the flight crew assumed the bathrooms were malfunctioning. It turns out the bathrooms were fine, the smell was coming off the French passengers.
In Washington State, a Ferry had to avoid hitting a sailboat and then the four sailors mooned the ferry. Witnesses on the ferry say the four Washington state yachtsmen set an unofficial world record for having the four whitest asses in history.
More tapes emerging of Mel Gibson screaming threatening obscenities and racial and sexual slurs at his ex-girlfriend. Hollywood insiders were shocked. Mel Gibson returned her phone call? Impressive.
Since you asked:
It is hilarious how the little things can get to you.
My album of the summer is the Rolling Stones “Exile on Main Street” Although not the album of a ton of hits, it is incredibly diverse and gritty. Although it isn’t one of my favorite songs, “Just Want To See His Face” is one of my favorite tracks because it captures so well the story of the Stones recording in the basement of a mansion in the South of France. The tribal drums echo with the women’s sexy chants to Mick’s howlin’.
When the girls chime in on their vocals I picture them as hot babes in bikinis singing in the hot, sweaty, dark, dirty basement. You can smell the salt air and hear wine corks popping just up stairs in the grand candlelit elegant dinning hall. As guitar great Ry Cooder once described, you can hear the room in the recording.
At a time when my whole world seemed like Nixon’s sweaty upper lip, avocado polyester leisure suits and gas lines, the Stones recording “Exile” in an exotic Mediterranean basement was the epitome of coolness.
Then I buy and watch the documentary “Exile on Main Street” and what do I see? The vocals were recorded at the plush Sound Factory on Sunset Blvd. Although hot babes, the girl singers were dressed in t-shirts and jeans in a California-chic room with wood panels and Oriental rugs.
So bummed was your buddy, Lex.
When did your buddy, Lex, start referring to himself in the third person?
posted by Alex at
4:03 PM
<< Home