Why will I forever love Groundskeeper Willy? He will always be despised by the French for calling them "Cheese-eating surrender monkeys."




Lex's thoughts for the day:

The difference between men's soccer and women's soccer? No crying, flopping and whining in women's soccer. And less hair bands.

If loneliness and failure had a smell? It would be body odor lingering with cigarette smoke in a taxicab.

What's the difference between a vampire and a vuvuzela? One sucks, the other one really sucks.

Exactly when did every woman under the age of 25 turn into a beta version of the Kardashians?

Do dyslexics with tourettes shout out futhermocker?

Since you asked:

The Groundskeeper Willy xenophobic crack reminds me of a few years ago when my daughter Ann Caroline and her great friend, Hannah - like A.C., also a born crack up - were going to French camp in La Jolla. (Yes, I will give my regular a.L.B.b. readers a chance to double-check if they are on the right blog)

My opinion of the French camp? The French head instructor was one of the friendliest, warmest, nicest, sweet and kindest young guys you'll ever meet. OK, maybe a little dorky. But one of the French female instructors was in all candor one of the most strikingly beautiful, sexy, intriguing-looking women I have seen either in real life, print, TV or movies. And I met Kathy Ireland in 1984. This French woman made Carla Bruni in her prime look like Charles Bronson.

So to say I was favorably impressed and pleasantly surprised by the La Jolla French camp French instructors is an understatement.

One day I was shuttling the girls to camp and they mentioned, without any trace of judgment in their tone, that they had many actual French children attending the camp with them.

"Are the French children nice to you?" I asked without intending to lead the witnesses. Both girls cracked up and in unison said:

"Oh no, they're not nice at all."