Saturday, March 08, 2008

Yo, dawg, check it out, dude, you kept it real, and besides some pitchy moments, that was money, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

After a 25-point loss to the Toronto Raptors, Heat Coach Pat Riley told the Miami Herald, "I should write a check to each season-ticket holder and send them back their money." Do you realize what this precedent means? Congratulations, New York Knick season ticket holders, you are now part-owners of the team.

Pro Golfer Tripp Isenhour was charged with intentionally killing a hawk which carries a max. 14-month jail sentence. He’ll serve his time under house-arrest at Dave Winfield’s joint.

The Iditarod started Saturday. Now they test the dogs for steroids. None of the dogs has tested positive, but one dog, Pacwolf Jones, was charged with assault after starting a fight in a strip club. He threw some Snausages in the air to make it rain and all hell broke lose.

A key aide for Barack Obama was quoted as calling Hillary Clinton a monster. When asked to comment, Hillary declined and then bit the head off of a native.