Tuesday, July 03, 2018

The Red Sox star, Mookie Betts, is related to Meghan Markle, the Duchess of Sussex. 

Please tell me this makes him the Duke of Mookies.

Please? 




In Thailand, the great news is they found the 12 boys lost in a cave for 9 days. The bad news is they have to get them out of there before Donald Trump has them detained.  





Michael Cohen has gone from "Willing to take a bullet" for Donald Trump to "Putting my family first." In dating terms, that is the difference between, "You complete me" and "So, is your sister seeing anyone?"





In Thailand, they found the 12 boys lost in a cave for 9 days. That is great news because they're already a week late for their shift at the Nike factory. 




Dearest Prudence:

As we proud members of the Virginia Man-Bun and Neck-Beard Brigade prepare our attack on a Cracker Barrel to oust a lunching White House staffer, I hold you in my heart like Trump grabs a pussy.   

Yours,

Colonel Covfefe Nambia 


#secondcivilwarletters