Saturday, September 03, 2016

The Vikings have traded for Sam Bradford. The trade includes a first round draft pick and a guy who vaguely looks like Ryan Reynolds to be named later.

In San Francisco, they still have not found the man who bit off a bartender’s finger. They brought in a lineup of suspects, but the bartender could not point out the culprit.

You have to hand it to the suspect for not getting caught.

The suspect is described as young, with dark hair and a biting wit. 

When asked why a stranger would bite off his finger, the bartender was stumped. 

You would think the police would have a lead considering they started with a hot tip. 

It was ironic because the bartender was about to cut him off. 

“Guys, if you’re thinking of dating Ann Coulter the good news is there is a 100 percent chance you will not get an STD. But there is a 100% chance you will get freezer burn.