In South Africa, surgeons completed the first ever 100% successful penis transplant on a 21-year-old man. They attached a penis to a man who didn’t have one. Finally good news for the New York Mets.

Boston sets a new record for annual snow. Asked to comment, one Boston man said; “Annual snow fall my ass, that snow is is way past my annual and up to my ears.”

In season 10 of “Keeping Up with the Kardashians”, Kim says she has sex with Kanye 500 times a day. Once again, “Keeping up with the Kardashians” confirms Hollywood is high school with money as long as it is a high school for the mentally challenged.

Harvard beat Yale in the Ivy League tournament to advance to the NCAA tournament. It was a good game, but the trash talking was weak: “Your reticence to capitulate will result in your resounding vanquishment.”