He's "Night-school" Wally and the Asbury Jukes, he's "Night-school" Wally, not called Kachooks, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers


We have a little heat spell; I’m sweating like a politician whose election bribe checks bounced.

I am sweating like a politician kissing a really ugly baby.

We here in Los Angeles have a little heat wave; Or as people on the East Coast call that: “Who gives a crap, you spoiled whimps?”

Last week, the San Diego Chargers defeated the Kansas City Chiefs; the Chargers were so excited, next week, they are going to try and beat a real NFL team.

Gas prices have come down a little. If gas prices drop a little more, Prius drivers will go from insufferable to merely annoying.

The band No Doubt pulled their latest music video because some Native Americans found it offensive. But apparently a team called the Washington Redskins is not a problem.

Here is a last-minute message to all those undecided voters out there: you’re a freaking idiot. You’ve had two years to decide, what the hell is wrong with you?