Friday, July 20, 2012

Got a couple hours? Let me tell you a little bit about myself as a person as well as a human being, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

US women's soccer goalie, Hope Solo, said there is a lot of sex in the Olympic Village. Remember sexy virgin hurdler, Lolo Jones? Hope Solo says zero hope of Lolo staying solo. 

Solo also implied she sneaked (snuck?) Vince Vaughn in her room and they had sex. For a great goalie, Solo sure lets a lot of balls go in between her legs.  

Since you asked:
We used to have this amazingly pretentious name-dropping friend who would throw herself at B-list celebrities and then run around bragging to whomever would listen how she and they were now "Close, personal friends."

As opposed to the distant, impersonal kind. What a righteous tool. 

This was the same woman who, with absolutely no sense of irony or sarcasm, would say on the phone;

"I've got to go, I have an important call on the other line."