Somebody has a case of the Mondays

We flea-doggin’ ‘n Toates McGoatsin’ all up in this here flambizzy, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers



In response to Arizona’s strict immigration law, the mayor of San Francisco is calling for a boycott of Arizona. This means Arizona will have to choreograph their square dances themselves.


In a “Forbes” survey the most liked mascot was the San Diego Chicken. The least liked mascot? The S.E.C. Choking Chicken.


The SEC employees who were caught surfing porn as much as eight hours a day have not been fired. Yeah, nobody wants to shake their hands goodbye.


In a “Forbes” survey the most liked mascot was the San Diego Chicken. The most loved mascot? Pea Ridge West Virginia high’s Katy the Cute Cousin.


In a “Forbes” survey the most liked mascot was the San Diego Chicken. The least liked mascot? USC’s Tommy the Popped Trojan.


“The National Enquirer” claims Tiger Woods confessed to sleeping with 121 women while married to Elin Nordegren. That’s a lot of strokes even for a golfer.


Friends of Heidi Montag are rumored to be worried Heidi has an addiction to pain killers; that is shocking. Heidi Montag has friends?


Turkish scientists claim they have found the remains of Noah’s ark on top of Mt. Ararat. In fact, they may even have the transcript of the last comment from Noah’s wife, Nammah. She said: “Bad news, Noah, I think the male unicorn is gay.”