Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Give that booty some attitudie, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

That hurts

A woman in Australia was arrested after she caught her husband cheating and set his genitals on fire; and she added insult to injury; she called it throwing his shrimp on the Bar-B.

Uh, no Sir, that’s not, oh forget it

There was an awkward moment today at his last White House press conference when President Bush was asked to defend his legacy, he said; “Well, I don’t drive a Legacy, at the ranch in Crawford I got me a Ford Expedition.”


In Beijing, Gu Gu the panda bit a guy, this  is the third time this has happened, who snuck into her enclosure. China may want to rethink their one-child-only policy if these guys are trying to sneak up on a panda.

Won that also

Mickey Rourke won best actor for “The Wrestler” at the Golden Globes, Rourke also won the less coveted “Actor Most Likely To Sqweegie your Windshield.”


The Adult Entertainment Industry, the porn folks, are asking the government for a $5 billion bail out. Talk about a money shot . . .


A Massachusetts teacher was arrested and accused of having sex with her teenage male student over 300 times. That has to be embarrassing for the boy because, as we all know, if you don’t do something right, teachers make you do it over and over and over again.

Porn bail out, take two

Although they need help, the porn folks want to make it clear that the bail out will be paid back, it is not a hand job, err, I mean hand out.

. . and three

A lot of people are against this, they’re afraid if they give the porn industry a bail out they’ll just blow it.