Hims likes thems, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers



In customs in Virginia, two women from Mongolia were caught trying to smuggle in 13 pounds of horse genitals. Incidentally, horse genitals is Eric Trump’s secret service codename.

New England Patriots receiver, Michael Floyd, received a 24-day jail sentence for an extreme DUI. The Patriots feel this sentence is inflated.

In Boston the day after the Super Bowl, a man got a tattoo of Tom Brady on his left buttocks. When asked why he had a tattoo of NFL commissioner, Roger Goodell, on his right buttocks, the man said, “No, that’s just my ass.” 

In customs in Virginia, two women from Mongolia were caught trying to smuggle in 13 pounds of horse genitals. Customs agents became suspicious when they asked if they had anything to declare and they both said. “Neigh.”

In customs in Virginia, two women were caught trying to smuggle in 13 pounds of horse genitals in juice boxes. Who else hoped they could have gone their whole life without hearing the words “Horse genitals in juice boxes?” 

Historians claims James Buchanan was the worst president in history. As of this writing. 

Donald Trump called the media the enemy of the American people. Remember the old days when our president thought Russia was the enemy and Anderson Cooper was our friend?

An opponent of the EPA, Scott Pruitt, has been named the head of the EPA. “Is that such a good idea?” Asked a fox guarding a hen house.

An opponent of the EPA, Scott Pruitt, has been named the head of the EPA. That’s as bad an idea as putting Chris Christie in charge of guarding the donuts. 

Since you askededededed:

Flamboyantly gay conservative, Milo Yiannopoulos, started riots giving a speech in Berkeley. The liberals turned on him faster than Hollywood turned on Caitlyn Jenner when she announced she was republican.

Milo is just a publicity whore. He has tapped into a niche with being a screaming queen who is a tea party/rightwing dickhead. It is just an act. He plays down to the stereotype of a bitchy queen at the expense of minorities and liberals. Many of whom Milo is right about their being whiny. 

But there is no excuse for Milo going after the awesome Leslie Jones. No excuse.