Wednesday, July 16, 2014

It is estimated the Kim Kardashian iPhone game could make $200 million. This estimate was in the latest issue of “Wow, That is Unfair” magazine.
There is also a Bruce Jenner video game, but halfway through it turns into a Grandma Jenner game.

There is a character in the Kim Kardashian video game who is a rude and stupid blonde woman allegedly based on Paris Hilton. If you get too close, you contract an STD.

Must have missed it when I watched the All Star game, but just how many weeks are the doctors giving Derek Jeter to live? 

Hate to admit it, but one of the best parts of the outpouring of affection for Derek Jeter is knowing A-Rod is physically ill with jealousy. 

Lex’s List of Things He Is Proud He Has Never Done Nor Will Ever Do:
Ask for an autograph signed* to me.
Get a tattoo.
Take a “selfie” on purpose.
Post a “selfie”.
Post a “selfie” of a meal.
Force bystanders to listen to my cell phone conversation.
Text while driving.
Post a political or inspirational message on Facebook
Beep the car lock when someone is standing near it.
Block a grocery store aisle.

Have too many items in the 12-items-or-less express check out

Park in a fire lane.

Take two parking spots.

Troll a celebrity on Twitter

*Twice I broke the no autograph rule for someone else. First it was a friend from Buffalo who was so star struck upon seeing Bills receiver, Andre Reed, he begged me to get an autograph for him. Yes, I told my friend my theory that autographs were simply proof you bothered a famous person, but he insisted.

Andre Reed was not talking to anyone, just standing alone in the lobby of the Red Robin. When I explained the need for an autograph for my friend, as well as supplying pen and paper, Andre refused and instead gave me a stern two-minute lecture on being rude to celebrities.

The next time I saw female soccer player, Joy “We live to promote soccer for the kids” Fawcett at a soccer tournament in Irvine and asked her to simply say hello to my then-ten-year-old daughter and Joy Fawcett refused.

Never again.