The Vatican smoke just turned from black to white and smells like a skunk. Congratulations to Pope Snoop Dogg.


Just kidding, first day of meetings and no Pope; come on, seriously, did the even look at my audition reel? 

Ikea still in trouble for their horse meat in their meatballs. Let me tell you something, if you're going to Ikea for your meatballs? You deserve to get hoof and mouth disease. Even Olive Garden makes fun of Ikea's meatballs. 

Attention neighbors: I am grilling Paella with oak wood on the Weber grill. When you see white smoke, that does not mean I picked a Pope...

Picked a Pope is my new ska band.