Well slap me baffy-headed and call me Dwayne, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

Did you see CNN’s Anderson Cooper giggling over the Gerard Depardieu plane-peeing story? My word, thirteen-year-old girls were calling to complain he sounded girlishly silly.

Did you see CNN’s Anderson Cooper giggling over the Gerard Depardieu plane-peeing story? He squeaked, giggled and cried. Well, that ought to end all the gay rumors.

French actor Gerard Depardieu got drunk and urinated on a French plane’s carpet. Luckily for the airlines cleaning crew it was not Gerard Depardieu-dieu.

His P.R. people said he was preparing for a role. “The Whizzard of Oz.”

When asked if he did it to get a commercial role, Depardieu said; “Depends.”

Even the French consider peeing in a plane cabin rude.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry said he does not believe in global warming. He says he just keeps getting hotter looking naturally.

Is it just me, or does Rick Perry look like a guy who brandishes a golden toothpick after a steak dinner?

Is it just me, or does Rick Perry look like a guy who stuffs a napkin into his collar before he starts loudly slurping up spaghetti?

Have you heard about the accusations of the University of Miami football team? Hookers, drugs, bribes, lavish hotel suites, yachts. That isn’t a football team, that’s a weekend with Charlie Sheen.