Friday, May 12, 2017

Don't send me a poop-emoji and tell me it is a Hershey's Kiss, Torn Slatterns and Nugget Ranchers

The White House claimed James Comey was fired for mishandling the Hillary Clinton email investigation. That’s like saying we are going after ISIS due to their poor table manners.

Donald Trump accused James Comey of being a showboat and grandstanding. Amazing coming from a guy who nicknamed his testicles Showboat and Grandstand.

Did Donald Trump really just Tweet about leaks? Somewhere two Russian prostitutes have just wet themselves… again. 

Donald Trump tweeted a threat of recording his conversations with James Comey. And Steve Harvey sent out a memo saying he does not want James Comey to talk to him. 

Steve Harvey issued a memo to his staff demanding nobody talk to him. Unless they have an update on the winner of the Miss Universe contest. 

Donald Trump just tweeted a threat of leaking a recording of his conversation with James Comey about being investigated after his firing letter that said he was not being investigated. How does Trump know which lie he has to lie about lying about?

A Chicago woman, distraught over her haircut, ran over her hairdresser eight times. He is badly hurt, but expected to live. In a related story, Donald Trump’s barber has been placed in protective custody.

A Florida dog trainer suspended for life for providing his dogs cocaine. They suspected the dogs were on cocaine because all they wanted to do was drink, play video games and talk smack.

Since you asked:

Not to date myself, but when I was a kid we had a succession of presidents who fought in the war. A few were war heroes. JFK got the Navy Cross. George H.W. Bush was a fighter pilot who got shot down. 

His son, George W. spent his military service in the National Guard on vacation in Alabama. 

Our current president was a military school bed-wetter and stayed out of Vietnam because he claimed to have a sore foot. 

At the rate we are going, in 2020 we will either elect Conrad Hilton president or a blow up sex doll. Personally I vote for the blow-up doll. It can be used for something.

Just saw HBO's “41” on GHW Bush. It struck me, besides being republican presidents, GHW Bush and Donald Trump could not be more opposite:

Bush was honest, smart, inquisitive, informed, modest, positive, loyal, funny, trusting, brave, hard-working, kind and generous. I'm not saying he was a great president, but he was a truly good and decent man.

And then there is Trump...