This just in:

For you undecided voters here is a tip: don’t forget, it is breathe in and then breathe out. Repeat. Write it down if you have to.


In their 24-0 loss to the Atlanta Falcons, the Oakland Raiders had ten total passing yards. “So, how was your weekend?” “Not bad, I managed just ten fewer passing yards than the entire Oakland Raiders.”

Oakland Raiders owner Al Davis has to be spinning in the coffin he sleeps in during the day.